June 25th 2007
Registration is open for my Teleseminar: Exploring The Law of Attraction on Wednesday July 18th at 7:30EDT.
Who’s Coaching Who?
I’ve always been coached by my clients. It’s one of the best things about being a coach – keeps me in the field and not on the sidelines. And boy, was I in the field last week.
I was on a (theoretical) vacation with Nancy and one of our granddaughters. It was a great vacation and, unfortunately, the good times are mostly in my memories – Recalling an event lets me see what actually happened and not what I thought was happening at the time.
The main thing I saw (for the nth time) is that being right is irrelevant – like arguing for the right of way with a bus. Who cares about right and wrong – much more useful to think about what works and what doesn’t work – Even though my history and my disposition tilts completely the other way.
And I discovered again that MY logic is not necessarily logical – certainly not to a six-year old. And is largely irrelevant. I’ve been trained to see certain behavior as ‘a racket’, aimed at dominating or largely controlling a situation.. Of course, it doesn’t look that way to the racketeer. But I was helpless agains my granddaughter’s apparent entomophobia (panic when seeing insects.)
And that’s when coaches need to be coached – thankfully, I have a fantastic coach, who I was lucky enough to have married.
Useful Quotes
If you're not making mistakes, then you're not doing anything. I'm positive that a doer makes mistakes." -- John Wooden
Coaches have to watch for what they don't want to see and listen to what they don't want to hear.
John Madden
Coaching is easy. Winning is the hard part.
Elgin Baylor
My notion about service is actually that kind of relationship in which you have a commitment to the other person. Now, I don't mean to the person's body or to the person's personality, or to the person's stomach, or the person's almost anything. What I mean in fact is that for me what service is about is being committed to the other being. To the other person spiritually. To who the other person is. Now the problem with that is that, to the degree that you are in fact committed to the other person, you are only as valuable as the degree to which you can deal with the other person's stuff, their evidence, their manifestation, and that's what service is about. Service is knowing who the other person is and being able to tolerate giving space to their garbage. What most people do is to give to people's quality and deal with their garbage. Actually, you should do it the other way around. Deal with who they are and give space to their garbage. Keep interacting with them as if they are God. And every time you get garbage from them, give space to the garbage and go back and interact with them as if they were God.
Werner Erhard
Creative Corner
Whittling Words
Memories of my mother’s love are wrapped in wood
easy to mistake for chunks of branch of tree,
raw, suitable for burning;
my face squirming beneath a washcloth;
discomfort at trying on clothes,
seeing the doctor,
taking the always foul-tasting concoction,
being on my best behavior,
stopping play and coming in the house, “Right Now!”
taking out the garbage,
doing my homework,
turning off the radio and going to bed.
I sit and whittle away the years,
each remembered unpleasantry,
a fire starter curl, another lie that hid the
underlying figurine of love.
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